fuck all of it. is loss exactly that? does it mean i should lose the memories and the love and whatever the fuck else i keep? forget all of it? free myself of it? did i hate to watch eternal sunshine because i knew it was real and an experience i never wanted to confront?
just pretend you've never been in love. pretend you've never even wanted to. this might be the only thing you can do to survive. your heart is much too sick otherwise. forget about it.
love material things. love experiences. forget companionship. forget passion. forget romance. forget intensity. forget trust. forget love. forget every single male you thought was worth anything.
"O, teach me how i should forget to think"
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Pretending you've never had the good... no, great times that come with companionship is something, unfortunately, what needs to be done to get through life. I've had to do it for years and years now.
ReplyDeleteI understand the hurt and the pain that comes along with having to forget the truth of what love once was... and I know that it straight up fucking sucks.
Love you friend... keep writing... it helps free the demons.
I hate to agree but I do agree. Don't get me wrong I'll never ever forget my past experiences but all the emotions and feelings that came with are pushed to very back of my mind. Sitting and slowly fading away. This blog is sad one but at the same time I'm happy for you cuz i'm hoping this will help and guide yourself to forget the pain, anger, and frustration that you feel. I know u think I joke or have one sided point of view when I say you are truly a beutiful women from the inside out. When your happy you tend shine even more beutifuly. But I'm telling even if I just met you I could see the same thing as I do now. I'll give u that I've known you for some time now but when I first met right away you struck as a beutiful girl and then when you spoke it just made you shined even brighter. Plez don't think that I'm trying to be just a friend when I say just think of me a stranger cuz Im not to just build you up I'm just trying show or should tell you from of my heart you are beutiful. I'm extremely lucky to have as a friend and any guy out there would be one lucky son of bitch to have you. I hope for nothing but your happieness and hopefully this pain will soon fade.
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